Bollywood has got its own synonym for sarcasm and its none other than Mrs Funnybones aka Twinkle Khanna. Be it Twitter or her columns she is irreplaceable when it comes to playing with words.

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As Vogue completes 10 years, she was honoured with Vogue Opinion Maker of the Year at the Vogue Women of the Year Awards. There she gave a brilliant speech comprising of 10 life lessons she learnt in the past 10 years of her life. Let’s take a look at them:

1. It’s true that we get more comfortable in our skin as we get older, but that is also because that poor thing is not as tight as it used to be.

2. We don’t need GST on our sanitary pads. What we need instead is an alarm inside it, not a wide breaking one as it would set us on a different path altogether – but an alarm nonetheless that warns us of imminent overflow, and saves us from the 100 trips we make to the bathroom just to check. Now that’s a product I could not grudge the GST on.

Twinkle Khanna's Vogue Speech Is A Must Watch For Everyone, Especially Men!
Twinkle Khanna’s Vogue Speech Is A Must Watch For Everyone, Especially Men!

3. Millions of Indian women fast for their husband’s long life on every Karwa Chauth. My dear friend who just won an award does immortalise this in his movies, but I don’t think that our 3033 gods are really listening. Because when the mortality charts show up, there are 147 countries above us where their men outlive our good old Indian dudes. So ladies! Stop because it’s clearly not working.

4. It’s difficult to befriend your present if you are still quarrelling with your past.

5. God could not be everywhere so he created mothers and the devil could not be everywhere so he created mothers-in-law. Having said that I feel like I am going to be a terrible one.

6. The only thing free in life is bad advice. Enough said.

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7. Botox, unfortunately, does not make you look younger. It just makes you look like you are a part of a secret alien invasion desperately trying to fit in with the humans.

8. Our satellite only reached Mars because it was called mom. I am certain that if it was called dad it would still be circling the Earth, lost but not willing to ask for directions.

9. Life is but a chance in the game of choice.

10. For centuries women have been looking for a cape but have been given an apron and it’s only recently that we have learned how to swing our aprons around. So let it flutter down our backs and let it take to the skies.

She concluded her speech with, “Awards like these validate our work and help us soar high.”

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