Desi Kattey Movie Poster
Desi Kattey Movie Poster

Rating: 0/5 Stars (Zero star)

Star Cast: Sunil Shetty, Akhil Kapur, Jay Bhanushali, Sasheh Aagha, Tia Bajpai, Murli Sharma, Claudia Ciesla

Director: Anand Kumar

What’s Good: Absolutely nothing

What’s Bad: Almost everything

Loo break: I haven’t seen the loo this crowded in a while.

Watch or Not?: Desi Kattey is the kind of film that makes me curse my otherwise really likeable job. Why on earth would someone decide to spend so much money in making a film that reads ordeal all over it. There is nothing good about the film and it doesn’t even try its hand to rise above its tedious storyline. It is not only a mere tirade, this one is an intolerable ruckus.

User Rating: 

Gyaani (Jay) and Paali (Akhil) are childhood buddies who aspire to become crime numero uno of Kanpur. Their only love is each other and their only weakness is each other. The two finally after much slogging come under the care of Crime Lord (Ashutosh Rana). But gang politics force them to seek training under a certain Major Rathore (Suniel Shetty) who trains the two for Shooting Championship. While Gyaani is lured by the world of success and winning his country gold medal, Paali satiates his temptation by becoming a crime lord. Their paths deviate and will the two ever come together the theme of Desi Kattey.

Akhil Kapur and Jay Bhanushali in a still from movie 'Desi Kattey'
Akhil Kapur and Jay Bhanushali in a still from movie ‘Desi Kattey’

Desi Kattey Review: Script Analysis

What script? The writers watched Gunday and thought probably copying the swagger into a low budget film will fetch them easy bucks. However, copying well is an art that most writers in Bollywood haven’t got a hang of. Desi Kattey copies Gunday for most part but doesn’t do so wisely. From the onstart itself the story doesn’t latch on too well with audiences. The logic gaps are too wide. A small boy has a crush on a girl. There is a good 8 years’ visible age difference between the two. A decade later, the girl hasn’t aged and the two fall in love and live happily together. How does the age math work out between them is beyond me.

The romance of the film is not between its male and female leads but more between its two male leads. It’s a shoddily written affair where you can’t connect with their pain, angst, love, affection, loyalty at any level.

The local politician adopts the two but the duo is framed by his jealous minions. One gets attracted towards winning gold at shooting and the other at buying gold via shooting. Women come. They fall in love respectively. The interval shot is classic. It also has the Gunday shot of Arjun shooting Ranveer. But all of it goes in vain because the film is coarsely made and is almost cringeworthy.

Desi Kattey Review: Star Performances

Jay Bhanushali is better than his last celluloid stint and in a film that is a ramp walk of bad acting, he pretty much manages to sleepwalk without being atrocious.

I have no comments for Akhil Kapur. Is he bad? Yes, very. Enough said.

Suniel Shetty was his usual self. While he hasn’t matured in years visibly, he still acts with the same flaws. He is earnest but not memorable.

The only good thing in this film is Ashutosh Rana and even he is in his worst form. Local goon is a role that is his expertise zone and he pretty much knows every nuance of this.

I am deliberately not mentioning the ladies because the film doesn’t acknowledge them enough for me to acknowledge them. They are mere props who appear as distraction more than a part of the story.

Desi Kattey Review: Direction, Editing and Screenplay

I wish I had anymore kind words to write about the film. But I don’t. The direction is incoherent, lacks maturity. It’s a lame work with pretty much no story to back it with. Inspired by swagger worthy running shots of people in Baywatch, Desi Kattey is neither soulful nor hot. It’s a sad watch which will tire you out and kill you with boredom. I don’t find it valid to waste any more words on a film like this. I will let it pass.

Desi Kattey Review: The Last Word

Desi Kattey is one drag of film that pretends to be a potboiler but ends up being a Gunday look alike gone wrong. I am not sure such films should be reviewed even. I bore through enough pains to write it and hence I feel too tired for stars.

Desi Kattey Trailer

Desi Kattey releases on 26th September, 2014.

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