While ‘a socially and ritually recognized union between spouses that establishes rights and obligations between them’ is how marriage is defined mostly, however, most married men beg to differ on this. For them, shaadi is an end – an end of bachelorhood a.k.a. days of no responsibility. Most men define marriage as a union where they enjoy no rights but are in constant need to pretend to oblige their cuties for choosing them as their Prince Charming! A bumpy ride of joy, sorrow and love, sprinkled with irritation, most men call marriage an eye-opener of their eyes that were blind in love.
So, taking a clue from the hilarious, intriguing and thought-provoking trailers of the soon-to-be-released Shaadi Ke Side Effects, here is compiled list of things that most men will no longer revel in once they are married. Things are sure to change. So, gear up, the ‘happily ever after’ myth is about to be busted!
Disclaimer: Reading these points will make married men weep and may give nightmares to bachelors.
Side-Effect #1: You + Marriage = Restricted Social Life!
Hot rooftop parties, late-night phone calls, exchanging girls’ numbers, night-outs, clubbing – does all these things tinkle some bells for you? Well, these are a part of every bachelor’s life. Once married, men no more get to enjoy these luxuries of life. And reasons, they are many!
Why would anyone invite you to a party if you keep getting a ‘Whr R U?’ or ‘Bhindi lete aana’ text all the time? Or why would your friends want to call late night when they know that your wife will pick up the phone to ‘inform’ that you are snoring when you are actually doing the dishes? Not only will your friends’ interests diminish towards you, your wife will pull you in house too.
So, that’s it! All you have left to socialize is with your in-laws! Damn!
Side-Effect #2: You thought are ‘man of the house’? LOL!
Ever heard of ‘Shaadi ke pahle aadmi sher hota hai, aur shaadi ke baad chuha’? Well… It’s true! Not only does marriage take away authority from men, it authorizes wives to get everything of their choice too. From choosing your clothes to the vaastu of the house, they take the pride in deciding everything after marriage. It’s their right! And what do men get to do? Simply follow them!
Hence proved, every lion has to abide by all the rules by their lioness after marriage!
Side-Effect #3: Either lose your credit card or just have a ‘SHARED’ one!
If you thought that e-banking was the fastest way to transfer funds, you are wrong! Not only will your wife spend all your hard earned money in buying expensive sandals and dresses, she will buy nothings as well! Matching table cloths to the curtains that match the color of the floor which is of the same color of their slippers which has to be in sync with their nightdress is their obsession in life!
So it’s true, while married men silently weep when they open their wallets and see the boldly engraved ‘SHARED’ on their credits cards, women simply enjoy their unhindered shopping.
Side-Effect #4: Alvida, sports!
Once you are married, forget spending your weekend on the fields playing cricket, you cannot even watch it. No, we aren’t talking of watching matches in the stadium, that’s a thing of Mars after marriage. Watching cricket or soccer on TV is itself difficult now! Either your wives will irritate you asking hundreds of hows and whys about everything happening on the field, or they will simply switch off the TV citing to your hoots and whistles that you do in excitement.
For them, watching daily saas-bahu serials can be a mature thing but sports are puerile for sure!
Side-Effect #5: Change your sleeping habits!
Do you have a snoring habit or enjoy dozing off on the couch? Well, that’s not going to happen once you marry – Never! After marriage, the first difference that magnify between couples is their sleeping habits. While sleeping on couch maybe a cool thing for men, after marriage, wives make sure to push their husbands to the bed. Not only will they chase them to the bed, they will make you sleep on ‘your’ side of the bed.
Yes, the negative thing about sleeping together is that you have your sides which cannot be exchanged – not until your woman would want to. And snoring, boss, it should be a thing of the past or you will be shown the door to the couch, this time by her choice!
(Disclaimer : The above opinions expressed are solely of the writer’s alone and doesn’t necessarily reflect the views of the editorial. Happy Reading!)